Archive for April, 2010

Back to the Slammer for Bookie Brothers

Saturday, April 3rd, 2010

 I read this week about two brothers who were arrested back in 2006, and pleaded guilty to bookmaking charges. At the time, the police accused them of running a multi million dollar sportsbetting operation. These guys got off relatively lightly and were put on probation. So what would you do if you were given a second chance? I guess the brothers didn’t understand the meaning of ‘second time burned’ because this week they were found guilty AGAIN of the same crime. This time the cops aren’t too pleased that the Mastronardo brothers didn’t learn their lesson the first time and they are looking at a l-o-n-g time in prison. Bail has been set to $1 million.

 So if we’re already on the subject of cheating, here’s a joke I heard from my doctor pal:

 The phone rings and the doctor hears his colleague’s voice on the other end of the line: “We need a fourth man for poker.” The doctor whispers: “I’ll be right over.” He grabs his bag and coat and runs to the door. “Is it serious?” asks his worried wife? “Oh yeah, really serious,” says her husband. “There are three doctors over there already!”

The Joke’s on Me!

Friday, April 2nd, 2010

Ok, I have to admit it. I fell hook, line and sinker for the article that was published today in the Winnipeg Sun stating that the Canadian government was set to introduce a tax on so-called ‘sin-sites’. The tax was supposedly aimed at sites that contained pornography, online gambling options and social networking such as Facebook. I was hopping mad, screaming obscenities to the screen and yelling that they had no right to impose such ridiculous tax on internet users and encroach on our freedom. And then this morning I read that it had been an April Fool’s joke. Oh. So I am red-faced and hanging my head in shame that my naturally cynical nature didn’t pick this up. The joke’s on me!

 And here the joke’s on him: Bill Gates reaches the gates of heaven and hell. The angel says: “We don’t know where to put you. You can choose between heaven and hell.” Bill peeks in to heaven and sees old men sitting around a table, bored out of their minds. He checks out hell and sees stunning women, sex, rock and roll and lots of gambling. “Hey, I’m a gambling man,” says Gates, “Take me to hell”. He enters the gates of hell and is immediately thrown into the pit of everlasting flames. “Why???” yells Gates. “I saw the women and the sex and the gambling with my own eyes!” “Oh that?” said the devil. “That was just the demo version.”