Ok, the prize for the dumbest thief definitely has to go to Adam Ramsay of Australia who was arrested this week for stealing a car belonging to poker pro, Van Marcus. Ramsay actually started off with a promising future for the title as Criminal of the Year. He casually walked up to the valet at the Crown Casino in Melbourne and pointed to ‘his’ car. The valet (incredibly, dumber than Ramsay), believed him and handed over the keys. Ok, this is where Ramsay starts to fail. Firstly, he stole the car of a very high profile poker player who would definitely squeal the minute he saw the back of his beloved car. Secondly, the car just happened to be a bright red F430 Ferrari Spider – not your average run-of-the-mill convertible, and not a car you would want to be driving if your goal was to remain inconspicuous. And thirdly, after several good hours of driving, Ramsay decided to put gas in the car at a station – where he was promptly arrested. Even his own lawyer told the courts: “He just couldn’t do something more dumb in the circumstances he was in.”
A blonde decides to do a good deed for her elderly neighbors and offers to do some painting for free. “What do I paint?” she asks eagerly. The old man thinks and then suggests the porch. The blonde happily agrees and the old man doesn’t expect to see her until the end of the day. However, half an hour later, the blonde turns up to the front door and states: “I’m done!” Then walking down the garden path, as an afterthought, she calls over her shoulder, “And, oh, by the way, that was a Ferrari, not a Porsche!”
