Archive for November, 2010

New Survey: Gamblers are Getting Younger

Tuesday, November 2nd, 2010

I read recently that the latest Annenberg Survey shows a rise in the number of youngsters who gamble online. According to the survey, compared to the last figures from a 2008 survey on the same number of kids, the number of college age students overall who gamble online climbed from 4.4% to 16%. There was also an increase in the number of high school age males who take to online gambling. But it was the figures on high school females that caught my eye. In 2008, 9.5% of these kids said that they bet on sport on a monthly basis. Yet, in the last survey, 22% said that did. Astounding, isn’t it?

Signs that your 10 year old is gambling:

  • He has painted the numbers 1 – 36 plus a O on the backyard merry go round.
  • He posts a line on his 5th grade spelling bee.
  • He knows how to convert money lines to must-win percentages.
  • The last meal that your family ate at McDonalds was comped.
  • He bought himself an iPad – with his own money.
  • The Stardust sent him free airline tickets.
  • He rolls his baby brother’s blocks and yells “seven come eleven!!!”
  • He tries to double down when he plays Go Fish.

Hit the Lottery… and then Died of Boredom

Tuesday, November 2nd, 2010

I read this week that Keith Gough, the guy who won the £9 million lottery in the UK five years ago, died this week. Cause of death: boredom. Apparently, after his win, Gough quit his job and went on a massive spending spree that included a box at Aston Villa Football Club, racehorses and a BMW. But after accumulating all these toys, he didn’t know what to do next – so he took up drinking. He didn’t get the hint when his wife left him. He didn’t get the hint when he was duped out of hundreds of thousands by a conman. And he didn’t get the hint when he started to develop stress-related heart problems. They poor guy died at the age of 58 with almost £800,000 in his estate – definitely enough to keep him happy for a long time to come. I guess some people just aren’t built to win the lottery. I, on the other hand….

A man walks into a bar and asks for a beer. After drinking it, he looks into his shirt pocket and asks for another beer. After drinking that one, he looks in his shirt pocket again and asks for another beer. This happens about seven times before the curious bartender asks: “Every time you order a beer you look in your shirt pocket. Why?”

The man replies: “I have a picture of my wife in there. When she starts to look good, I’ll go home.”

Poker Pros Sued Through Crazy Illinois Gambling Law

Tuesday, November 2nd, 2010

Did you know (I sure didn’t) that there is a law in the state of Illinois where you can basically accuse someone of illegal gambling and claim three times the total winnings made – even if you weren’t the person cheated out the money. So, this guy, Scott Crespo decides that he’s going to sue six poker professionals who are regular players at Bodog Poker and Full Tilt and who have made winnings of over $14 million online and $4.3 million offline. Crespo claims that the group used collusion, cheating and online bots to win games and tournaments, and wants three times what they won at the over 700 tournaments that they took part in…. I don’t know what type of proof this guy has, but it seems it’s just another case of a delusional individual clogging up the legal system for his few minutes of glory.

He’s a joke about cheating of a different kind…courtesy of Jokes4All:
A woman was cleaning her husband’s dresser drawer when she found 3 golf balls and a box with $2000 in it. She waited for him to come home from the golf course to ask him why these things were hidden in his dresser drawer.

The husband said “I’m sorry I hid this from you but the truth is every time I cheated on you over the last 30 years I put a golf ball in the drawer.”

The wife was very upset at first but after thinking about it said: “I guess 3 times in 30 years is really not that bad! Oh by the way what is the $2000 in the drawer? The husband replied: “Well every time I got to a dozen balls I sold them.”